Dungeon Crawler Carl
by Matt Dinniman
Contents
Chapter 3
Overview
Carl opens his remaining loot boxes and gets several key upgrades, including an automaton crafting kit, a powerful reflective buckler-bracer, and an unsettling god-linked nipple ring that enables anti-religious effects like Black Nimbus. The Celestial Predator reward becomes a divine back patch, The Scavenger’s Daughter, which doubles Carl’s jacket patch bonuses, adds huge Strength/Dexterity, and introduces risky abilities like Soul Reaper and a one-use Mysterious Bone Key that can destroy the jacket and cost Carl a permanent bone. As the team checks on other crawlers’ conditions via messages and Mordecai reveals he hired a room attendant, Donut discovers their Faction Wars flag is pre-designed by the system and is outraged—while Carl finds it hilarious.
Summary
In the saferoom, Carl opens his backlog of reward boxes. He gets a pile of standard supplies (healing and mana potions, Phase Through Wall, and Invisibility), a Town Upgrade coupon from the Tina quest, and a gold-quest reward that turns out to be an Enchanted Prison Tattoo Kit, the same kind of tools used to place magical tattoos on Tsarina Signet. He also receives a small peace-symbol upgrade patch, another mercenary coupon, a Cosmic Buff potion (which Mordecai wants to evaluate before Carl uses it), and a humiliating but powerful god-linked item: an Enchanted Nipple Ring of the Defiler that grants religious detection, shrine-destruction immunity, bonus damage to clerics, and a once-hourly Black Nimbus cast.
Carl’s legendary rewards include a bracer-style shield, Enchanted Right Back Atcha Personal Shield, which can catch and reflect physical or magical bolt attacks and sometimes double the reflected power. On Mordecai’s advice, Carl replaces his older buckler (the one he got from Katia) and adds it to the team’s growing gear pile for Faction Wars. Another major reward is Doctor Ratchet’s Automaton Build-It Kit, a trove of rare parts that matches recipes Carl has seen in the stolen production-facility instructional book.
The biggest suspense item, the Celestial Predator box, produces only a single “divine” back patch: The Scavenger’s Daughter. It is unique and fleeting, hides its effects until worn, and can change buffs or debuffs depending on nearby deities or demons. After getting an achievement that warns divine items can unpredictably curse as well as empower, Carl also drinks a skill upgrade potion that boosts Find Traps to 13, making most traps visible unless carefully hidden by a trapmaster.
Carl sews the peace patch onto his jacket first (despite Donut’s harsh critique of his stitching), then attaches The Scavenger’s Daughter back patch. During the work, Carl notices an extra mercenary-style dot on the local map; Mordecai admits he hired a room attendant with his upgraded quarters but refuses to make it a big deal. Carl also reviews messages: Florin got another shotgun upgrade and is in Ecuador, in contact with Lucia Mar; Katia reports Britney is inconsolable and injured after Firas’s death, and Tran has lost his legs (with Daniel Bautista helping) and received a floating wheelchair in his pacifist box; Li Na got a robe upgrade that improves her chain throwing; Donut loudly predicts Britney could be heading toward a “villain origin story.”
Once equipped, the divine back patch doubles all jacket patch stat benefits and adds +25 Dexterity and +25 Strength, while also promising notifications when deities enter the area. It reveals three special benefits: Climb; Soul Reaper, which charges a new Soul Essence bar from melee kills and can unleash that stored essence in a single, highly variable empowered attack (but becomes dangerous if hoarded too long); and Mysterious Bone Key, a one-time “open any lock” option that destroys the patch and jacket and consumes a non-regenerating bone from Carl’s body. As Carl and Mordecai weigh the power and risk, Donut storms in furious about the squad’s pre-made Faction Wars flags, and Carl bursts out laughing at what she shows him.
Who Appears
- CarlOpens loot boxes, equips divine back patch, upgrades gear, and learns risky Soul Reaper and bone-key power.
- Princess DonutCritiques Carl’s sewing, monitors social media, and erupts over the squad’s pre-designed Faction Wars flag.
- MordecaiAdvises on items, warns about Soul Reaper, and admits he hired a room attendant via upgraded quarters.
- SamanthaObserves loot opening, comments on the divine patch, and is discussed as possible divinity-adjacent influence.
- MongoTerrified by the celestial box light show; follows Donut to check messages.
- KatiaMessages Carl about team status, Britney’s breakdown, and Tran’s injuries and new wheelchair.
- FlorinReports another shotgun upgrade; says he is in Ecuador and in contact with Lucia Mar.
- BritneyStill burned and grieving Firas; sits crying and clinging to Louis, worrying Katia and Donut.
- LouisOn Katia’s team; supports Britney as she grieves, not yet opening his own boxes.
- TranHas lost his legs and is in poor condition; receives a floating wheelchair in a pacifist reward.
- Li NaReceives a robe upgrade that boosts her chain-throwing abilities; used as comparison for anti-deity effects.
- Daniel BautistaStays with Tran and helps him cope after severe injuries and loss of a companion.
- ImaniSuggested by Carl as someone who can help talk to and stabilize the distraught Britney.
- Lucia MarMentioned as Florin’s outside contact while he reports his location and upgrades.
- ElleBecomes the subject of a new fan group online; unimpressed by the attention Donut reports.
- FirasRecently died; his death continues to destabilize Katia’s team, especially Britney.