Chapter 38
Contains spoilersOverview
Sam’s absence halts therapy as Scarlett overhears coaches questioning her progress and roster spot. Humiliated, she masks her distress around Pen. Later, videos of Lukas’s swimming career and family trigger complicated emotions, but the Swedish word “mysig” offers Scarlett a fragile sense of comfort amid mounting self-doubt.
Summary
On Wednesday, Sam is out sick, leaving Scarlett both relieved and discouraged about therapy. While heading to notify Coach Sima she’ll be late, she overhears coaches discussing her through his ajar door. They call her situation a waste, say her mental block has persisted despite multiple professionals, doubt she’ll qualify for nationals, and even question whether she should keep a team spot. Shaken, Scarlett retreats, seething with shame and self-loathing.
In the locker room she runs into Pen. Pen, unaware that Lukas recently left Scarlett to help her, casually checks in. Scarlett forces cheerfulness and changes for synchro training, determined to mask her spiraling emotions.
Over the next days Scarlett feels despondent and jittery. Doomscrolling leads her to videos of a young Lukas breaking records at fourteen; the camera shows Jan, other brothers, their father, and Lukas’s mother celebrating in the stands. The sight both warms and unsettles her.
She then watches his Olympic medley, noting Lukas’s calm focus and the family in the bleachers—Jan, two women, a toddler, and their father—but not his mother. Overwhelmed, Scarlett exits the video and looks up the Swedish word Lukas taught her: “mysig,” meaning cozy and comforting. Though she feels like a failure, the word becomes a small, steadying anchor.
Who Appears
- Scarlett (Vandy)
Protagonist; devastated by coaches’ doubts, hides distress from Pen, doomscrolls Lukas’s past, and finds comfort in the word “mysig.”
- Pen
Teammate and friend; checks on Scarlett in the locker room and trains synchro, unaware Lukas left to help her earlier.
- Coach Sima
Diving coach; leads a discussion doubting Scarlett’s progress and whether she should keep a roster spot.
- Coach Urso
Coach; acknowledges limited hope under event requirements, effectively reinforcing doubts about Scarlett’s future.
- Bradley
Conditioning director; wonders if her block will pass, contributing to talk of removing her from the team.
- Lukas Blomqvist
Champion swimmer and Scarlett’s Dom; appears in old race videos and introduces “mysig,” which steadies her.
- Jan
Lukas’s brother; seen in the stands supporting Lukas in archival footage.
- Sam
Therapist; out sick, leaving Scarlett without a session or progress.