Chapter X
Contains spoilersOverview
Charlotte resolves to live alone emotionally and avoid attachments after Penny’s death. She keeps brief, noncommittal encounters and records partners’ names and small details in Penny’s copy of The Secret History as proof she can take and leave without endangering them. For years she secretly double-checks that these women remain safe, then eventually stops when all seems well and Sabine appears to have lost interest. The chapter closes with Charlotte apologizing to Alice, admitting she believed Alice would be safe.
Summary
After vowing to end Sabine’s interference, Charlotte chooses solitude over companionship, distinguishing between being lonely and being alone. She commits to avoiding love and only allows herself brief, transactional encounters that satisfy hunger and warmth without attachment.
Charlotte keeps a record of these one-night stands in the final blank pages of Penny’s paperback, The Secret History, noting only first names and vivid details: Maddie’s blue eyes, Jess’s freckles, Chloe’s rings. She frames the notes as an inversion of Sabine’s tokens, not a tally of deaths but a ledger of lives preserved through Charlotte’s restraint and departures.
For years, Charlotte retraces her steps after each encounter to verify the women are alive and unharmed. Each time she checks, she finds them safe, which reinforces her belief that her strategy—taking and leaving—protects others.
Over time, the repeated confirmations and the pain of looking back lead Charlotte to stop checking every name. She convinces herself there is no need, believing Sabine has tired of hunting her and moved on to other pursuits.
The chapter ends with a direct address to Alice, where Charlotte apologizes and confesses she truly thought Alice would be safe, implying that her assumption was gravely wrong.
Who Appears
- Charlotte
protagonist; adopts a disciplined, detached approach to relationships, keeps a ledger of brief encounters, and eventually stops checking on past partners.
- Sabine
antagonist; does not appear directly but is central to Charlotte’s fear and strategy; Charlotte believes Sabine has lost interest.
- Penny
Charlotte’s lost lover; referenced through her copy of The Secret History, which Charlotte uses as a record.
- Alice
confidante/listener; addressed directly by Charlotte with an apology, indicating Alice was believed to be safe.
- Maddie
new; brief encounter recorded by Charlotte as having very blue eyes.
- Jess
new; brief encounter noted for star-like freckles.
- Chloe
new; brief encounter noted for rings on every knuckle.