The author argues that society acts like a persuasive salesperson about parenthood, swinging between idealized bliss and grim sacrifice. These exaggerated messages, called “poison vials,” cloud judgment. The chapter proposes examining beliefs against reality to make a rational, values-based baby decision.

Myths about parenthood are questioned: infancy does not last forever; resenting lost freedom is normal and manageable if the desire for a child outweighs costs; and absolute certainty is unrealistic, as ambivalence is part of any major commitment. The chapter warns against adopting blanket negativity about children, noting that childfree life also requires tradeoffs. Anecdotes show unexpected joys alongside difficulty, and readers are urged to listen critically to parental complaints, seek diverse examples, and notice their own resilience.

Myths about the childfree path are also challenged: fear of future regret need not dictate having a child; one can want children yet prioritize other goals; and nurturing needs can be met beyond parenting. Examples include Evan and Mia, whose “baby hunger” was situational, and Mindy, whose skills with children don’t obligate her to parent. The chapter reframes “selfishness” as distinct from healthy self-love and notes that courage or fear can underlie either choice, which will evolve over the lifespan.

Preparation myths are addressed: caring for a pet is not a proxy for parenting. Child-borrowing can mislead without context, illustrated by Nick and Emily’s effortless day with Melissa and by Chris and Elli’s difficult visit with Joshua, shaped by his stranger shyness and their anxiety. The author offers practical guidelines for borrowing children—build familiarity, equip properly, sample ages and conditions, avoid hidden agendas, and debrief—to inform but not decide the question.

The chapter closes by validating changed minds, as with Jessie and Kyle, former childfree advocates who later chose a baby, and by dispelling the “two or none” belief, citing evidence that only children can thrive. Readers are reminded to keep societal messages in perspective and prevent these “poisons” from steering their decision.